this is the best thing in the entire world
she should greet jane as if nothing happened and see how jane reacts
she should avoid school the next day. And the next. Every night, she should put on the exact outfit she had on that day, hose herself down until she’s completely drenched and stand in Jane’s yard. When Jane is home alone, she should approach the window, staring at her. Knock on it if you don’t have her attention.
That’ll get her back for killing you and trying to hide the evidence.
Ease up there, Satan.
Ease up? SHE TRIED TO KILL HER
“Do you like sex? Sex. I mean, the physical activity. Coitus. Do you like it? You’re not interested in sex? Men think that feminists hate sex, but it’s a very stimulating and natural activity that women love.”
— Translation of French lyrics in Beyonce’s “Partition”.
This is never not funny to me.
An abandoned house in San Sebastián de la Gomera, Spain, was investigated by police after calls from neighbors. Inside, they found a wasp nest that almost filled a room.
No no no no no Nooope burn it down
The seven deadly sins of the Christian Church are: greed, pride, envy, anger, gluttony, lust, and sloth. Satanism advocates indulging in each of these “sins” as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification. A Satanist knows there is nothing wrong with being greedy, as it only means that he wants more than he already has. Envy means to look with favour upon the possessions of others, and to be desirous of obtaining similar things for oneself. Envy and greed are the motivating forces of ambition - and without ambition, very little of any importance would be accomplished. Gluttony is simply eating more than you need to keep yourself alive. When you have overeaten to the point of obesity, another sin - pride - will motivate you to regain an appearance that will renew your self-respect. Anyone who buys an article of clothing for a purpose other than covering his body and protecting it from the elements is guilty of pride. It must be pointed out to these destroyers of labels that one or many articles they themselves are westing are not necessary to keep them warm. There is not a person on this earth who is completely devoid if ornamentation. The Satanist points out that any ornamentation of the scoffer’s body shows that he, too, is guilty of pride. Regardless of how verbose the cynic may be in his intellectual description of how free he is, he is still wearing the elements of pride. Being reluctant to get up in the morning is to be guilty of sloth, and if you lie in bed long enough you may find yourself committing yet another son - lust. To have the faintest stirring of sexual desire is to be guilty of lust. In order to unsure the propagation of humanity, nature made lust the second most powerful instinct, the first being self-preservation. Realising this, the Christian Church made fornication the “Original Sin.” In this way they made sure nobody would escape sin. Your very state of being is as a result of sin - the Original sin! The strongest instinct in every living thing is self-preservation, which brings us to the last of the seven deadly sins - anger. Is it not our instinct for self-preservation that is aroused when someone harms us, when we become angry enough to protect ourselves from further attack? A Satanist practises the motto, “If a man smite thee on one cheek, smash him on the other!” Let no wrong go undressed. Be as a lion in the path - be dangerous even in defeat!
Photographs by Thom Sheridan
In 1986, the United Way attempted to break the world record for balloon launches, by releasing 1.5 million balloons, which resulted in two deaths, millions in lawsuits, and a devastating environmental impact.
How did people die?!?!?
Like fiery eyeball thing, no problem. But don’t even try to imagine a Samoan elf. (x)
Lise Charmel. I need to get to lingerie shows like this.
Brand: Andrea Iyamah
Designer: Andrea Iyamah
Swimwear 2014 Collection
Adore adore adore